


Missing Them Was Dark Grey

by Superhusbandsfamily



Series: Flashbacks And Echoes [5]
Category: Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Marvel (Comics), Marvel (Movies), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Domestic Avengers, F/M, Gen, M/M, Stony - Freeform, Superfamily, Superhusbands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-08
Updated: 2014-01-08
Packaged: 2017-11-26 18:40:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/653245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Superhusbandsfamily/pseuds/Superhusbandsfamily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Variant 3<br/>Through the eyes of Peter Benjamin Stark-Rogers<br/>'"Peter! You ready to go?" shouts a man from downstairs. Am I ready to go?'</p>
            </blockquote>





	Missing Them Was Dark Grey

       Hi!

       They call me Peter!

       Peter Benjamin Stark-Rogers, that’s my name. It’s pretty long. I wish people could pick their own names. I would choose something cooler, but maybe Peter isn’t so bad. It’s a lot better than some of the boys in my school. My daddies always tell me I have the bestest name in the World and I should be very proud. So, I guess I am.

       Yup, I have two daddies!

      I get picked on in school for not having a Mommy, but its okay. My daddies say it makes me special. Papa and Daddy got into a fight once because a big bully named Dick beat me up. Daddy wanted to ‘kick his ass’ but Papa didn’t allow him to. Papa said ‘nothing is ever solved with violence’ and that Dick is ‘only a little kid’.

       But I’m five and Dick's five too!

       I’m no ‘little kid’...

       Daddy and Papa don’t know, but Uncle Clint and Uncle Johnny thought me to how to fight and I get bullied no more!

       My uncles laughed when I told them I punched Dick to the ground. They made jokes about his name and where I hit him. It wasn’t funny to me. I don’t understand grownups sometimes. They’re really weird.

       But that was all a long time ago. It was when people at school didn’t know who my Daddy and Papa were. They sure do now!

       Huge, ugly, purple monsters attacked my school one day, and Daddy and Papa and the Avengers saved everyone. They were scared and went looking for me first and were very happy when they found me. I told them I was okay and that they should help other people.

       The other kids and my teachers saw them give me mushy hugs and icky kisses before they left, and that was when they figured out who my daddies really were.

       Let me tell you about them!

       Daddy’s name is Tony and he’s really cool!

       Daddy has a red and gold suit he built himself. He has many different suits but that one’s his favourite. The metal makes him stronger so he can help people. He can fly and shoot laser beams and people call him 'Iron Man'. Daddy says no one can ever hurt him because he's _invincible_!

       Daddy has a talking computer. His name's JARVIS. JARVIS sounds a bit goofy when he speaks, but Daddy always says JARVIS is very important and I shouldn’t make fun of him. JARVIS makes sure Daddy does things right.

       I’m like Daddy’s _assistant_ too. I like helping out in Daddy's workshop. He lets me play with his tools. Daddy sometimes puts games on his _holograms_ for me when he’s not busy _inventing_. They’re really great and he usually plays with me too. I like it when he does. He makes the game more fun!

       Daddy also teaches me about his gadgets and robots. Daddy told me the first robot he ever built was Dum-E. Dum-E messes things up all the time but Daddy always gives him another chance because ‘you never give up on the things you love’. Daddy was only seven years old when he made Dum-E!

       I want to build something when I’m seven too. Daddy says I’m really smart like him and I can build more than just one robot. He promised he would help me on my birthday. I can’t wait!

       Daddy has _interesting_ stories about cars. One time, there was a shiny, red _Mustang_  he fell in love with the first time he ever saw it. He wanted it a lot but it was very expensive. Daddy and Aunty Pepper started _arguing_ because he ‘didn’t need it'. Daddy decided she was right and he ‘donated the money to charity’ instead. Aunty Pepper was very glad. Daddy told me what he had felt for that nice car was nothing compared to the love he felt when he first met Papa. Daddy taught me that ‘money can't buy happiness’ and he’s so _grateful_  we are his family.

       My Daddy’s awesome but some people don’t like him very much. They say Daddy’s evil and he hurt a lot of people. I don’t think so. They call him a _playboy_ and an _inebriated fool_. I don’t know what a _playboy_ is and no one will tell me, but I’m sure Daddy isn’t one. Is it someone that plays a lot?

       I play a lot too. Does that make be bad?

       Uncle Bruce explained some things and I think those meanies are wrong. Daddy doesn’t smell like _booze_ unless he and Papa had a party, but then everyone smells like that!

       I’ve never seen Daddy _drunk_ and he has never, ever hit me.

       I love my Daddy and he loves me. I think people who say Daddy’s bad, are bad people. Daddy _despises_ them and I don’t like them too. 'Just smile and walk away', he says. Daddy’s smart and brave and kind. He’s my hero!

       Daddy has an _arc reactor_ in his chest when no one else does. He was captured a long time ago by a bunch of _wicked_ people that _tortured_ him, but he had help from his friend, Yinsen. Yinsen kept him alive with _batteries_ , but they knew it wouldn’t last long, so Daddy _created_ a "heart" for himself. Daddy found out later that his ‘father figure’, Obie had _betrayed_ him and wanted to kill him.

       Daddy gets sad when he remembers that story and when he tells me about Grandpa Howard. Daddy says Grandpa was a very _horrible_ man that threw things at him and whipped him with his belt. Daddy showed me some of his old scars when I asked him to. He thought I would be afraid, but I told him I wasn’t and he smiled. Daddy promised he'll never be like grandpa and he'll never hurt me. He won't let anyone else 'cause me pain' either.

       I asked Daddy if he still had a normal heart, and he said it’s better than that, because now he has a powerful one with more love to give and it only beats for Papa and me.

      So, that’s all about my Daddy. Its Papa’s turn!

      Papa’s named Steve and people say he’s a ‘true American hero’!

      Papa’s very old, but he looks younger than Daddy. Daddy gets angry when I say that. Uncle Director Fury sat me on his lap once and told me the story about my Papa and why Daddy calls him a _Capsicle_ sometimes.

       Papa was born a long, long time ago when evil people called the _Nazis_ were trying to ‘rule the World’. They’re gone now because Papa was _injected_ with a 'super-soldier serum' and became 'Captain America'. The 'Howling Commandos' and Papa helped get rid of the _Hydra_ leader, 'The Red Skull', but to save everyone, Papa had to sink an aeroplane into the freezing ocean. He was _trapped_ in ice for years until Uncle Director Fury and his _S.H.I.E.L.D. agents_ found Papa and ‘fished him out’.

       Papa’s very different from everybody else in some ways. He knows a lot from the past, but not from the now. Papa needs help with the computer and I help him sometimes which makes Daddy laugh.

       I like the stories Papa tells me of the past when he was a little boy. Papa says he was small like me and he got bullied too, but then one day, he joined the army and got tough. I asked Papa if he'd teach me how to be strong too and he promised he will when I’m older. I promised him I'll _train_ hard!

      Sometimes Papa starts talking about the war and his soldier friends. Papa had a best friend, Bucky who ‘served his country well’ but ‘died in combat’. Stories of the past upset Papa. He also talks about a girl named Peggy and how he didn’t get to see her again. Its sounds very sad too but Papa says it’s alright because he was lucky and got to meet Daddy instead. He never 'missed the dance’. Papa says he's very happy being with us and he doesn’t miss ‘his time’ anymore.

       Papa likes to draw. He can draw really _beautiful_ things that he hangs up all over the house. It’s mostly _sketches_ of the city, or his friends, or Daddy and me, but sometimes Papa paints. I like those better. Papa even does some of my favourite cartoon characters. Papa says he was _supposed_ to go to an art school before but ‘realised his priorities’ and gave up on the _opportunity_. I love when we sit in the park and draw whatever we see, just the two of us. It's quiet and _peaceful_ and feels really nice. Papa tells me I'm _talented_ like him, but I don’t think so, and he said, ‘be patient’ and ‘never give up on whatever I do’, only then will I be _rewarded_.

       Papa taught me how to ride a bike. He said it was important that I learnt because it’s a ‘rite of passage’ and Daddy _smirked_. Daddy didn’t know how to ride a bicycle either, so Papa had to teach him too. Daddy fell off a lot, it was very funny. When I could finally cycle on my own, Papa helped Daddy build me my own big boy’s bike with no _training wheels_!

       My bike is blue with red stripes and I love it. Daddy wanted it to fly, but Papa said 'no' because it was too _dangerous_. That’s okay. It’s still a lot cooler than the bikes other kids have. Papa says I shouldn’t care even if I had an ugly bike because it was bad to be _materialistic._  Daddy and Papa then argued for a bit before laughing and bringing me to the park. We spent the whole day there. I was cycling beside Daddy with Papa jogging behind us. We had a picnic for lunch and watched the clouds that Daddy gave funny names to!

       Some people don’t like Papa either. They still blame him for what happened during the ‘Superhuman Registration Act’ that caused ‘Civil War’. People say he started it. He _disobeyed_ and 'rebelled against his country', but Daddy adds that if they say its Papa’s fault, then it’s his fault too. Papa only does what he ‘truly believes is justified’. He stands up for the things he cares about and always puts them first. I love my Papa. He’s _wonderful_! 

       Daddy says some people will just never ‘forgive and forget’. Papa has helped more people than he has _disappointed_ , so it’s not fair to ‘keep going on about one mistake’. Papa says people make mistakes all the time and that’s what ‘makes us human, not God’. Papa doesn’t mind if people forget he stopped the war and almost died doing it. He tells me to always ‘do what’s right and never expect anything in return’. I told him I’m very proud to be his son and he gave me a big hug.

       So, that’s all about my daddies- _oh, wait!_

       There's one more thing!

       I haven’t told you the most important thing yet!

       You see, there’s something else you should know about my daddies...

_***Ding dong***_

       “Peter! You ready to go?” shouts a man from downstairs. Am I ready to go?

       I look around my room.

       I’ve put everything important into my _duffel_ ; the robot toy from the bookshelf Daddy made for me, the framed family photo on my bedside table Papa painted, Daddy’s band t-shirt and Papa’s old baseball cap from the cupboards, the note they left me stuffed in my jacket pocket, and I've grabbed Teddy off my bed.

       Everything else is already packed up.

       I take my bag and run down the stairs with Teddy _cradled_ in my arms.

       I stop to get one last look at the living room where my daddies and I spent most of our nights watching movies or reading books, and the kitchen where Papa and I used to wake Daddy up early to make pancakes. There are boxes stacked all over now and the other parts of the house are already empty.

       I think I’m ready, so I start walking again.

       Uncle Clint’s leaning at the door waiting for me. I can see Aunty Tasha in the car outside. I’m _supposed_ to go live with them now. I don’t want to leave, but I have to. This cannot be my home anymore. Daddy told me to ‘be brave’ and Papa said to ‘be a good boy’, and I will. I promised them, but I don’t want to go.

       I’m scared. I don’t understand.

       Why aren't they coming back?

       Aunty Pepper told me in the hospital it’s because something very bad happened and they’re in 'a better place' now.

       But don’t they love me anymore?

       Yes, yes they do.

       Daddy and Papa said they love me and they'll always love me. I know they didn’t want to go. I know they didn't want to leave me. I told them I’ll wait for them, but they said not to. They told me I’ll see them again one day, not now, not tomorrow, but someday.

       Uncle Clint is calling me again, but _I don’t want to go!_

   _I want my Daddy and Papa!_

_It’s not fair!_

_I want them now!_

       _I miss them so, so much!_

       I drop my bag and Teddy to wipe my eyes. Something inside me hurts and I want it to go away. Uncle Clint picks me up. “I know buddy, I know.” He lets me cry on his shoulder and tells me its okay.

       I remember my daddies' words, and I stop crying. I’ll try to be the big boy they want me to be. I promised them and ‘promises are not meant to be broken’.

       Uncle Clint carries me out with my bag in his hands and Teddy in my arms once more. I look back and try to smile as I say goodbye.

       Goodbye, JARVIS.

       Goodbye, house.

       Goodbye, daddies.

       I will love you both.

       Always...

> _**Dear Peter,** _
> 
> _**You must be wondering why this is happening to you and we’re so sorry. You’re smart and you'll understand one day why we had to leave you.** _
> 
> _**Bad things do happen, Peter. You already know that, but remember. All the bad things that could ever happen to you has already happened. You don’t have to worry about anything bad ever happening again. You had it all happen to you at once. This is a good thing, Peter. It might not seem like it now, but it is.**_
> 
> _**We love you so much, Peter. You’re the greatest thing that's ever happen to us. We’re so happy we got to be your parents. You blessed our lives with joy and wonder!**_
> 
> _**You’ll miss us, but we’ll miss you even more. We’re sorry for making you sad. We promised we would protect you from ever being hurt, but we broke our promise, didn't we?**_
> 
> _**You have to live with Uncle Clint and Aunty Tasha. They’ll take care of you. Listen to them. They’re your Mommy and Daddy now, don’t be afraid. There’s nothing to be scared of. Alright, buddy?**_
> 
> _**We’ll always be with you, Peter. We’ll live in your heart forever and you’ll always be in ours, even when you’re all grown up and don’t need us anymore. No matter what choices you make in the future, we’ll always be proud of you because we believe in you.** _
> 
> _**It's time to end this letter now, Peter. It’s time to say goodbye. We’ll meet again someday. Don't forget Daddy and Papa will never stop loving you. You’re our little boy and you’ll always be. We love you so much, to the stars and back.** _
> 
> _**Goodbye Peter, take care.** _
> 
> _**Love Always,  
>  Daddy and Papa**_


End file.
